I cannot abide the idea of a dinner party. If I was invited to one I know I wouldn't take up the invitation. The very idea of people mulching over their food directly opposite someone that's only inches away from them seems almost barbaric to me. It reminds me, for some reason, of going back to being a child,
I feel like a child just thinking about it.
I'm forced to sit at the table, no elbows, good manners at all times, and always remember to listen and answer when spoken to.
And when you've finished don't leave the table until everyone else has finished, there's a good girl.
It makes me want to do all the things I know I shouldn't. Shout and swear and burp and fart.
Whatever you do, don't ever invite me to a dinner party...
